Thursday, June 15, 2006
Revenge of the limericks
‘Tis the summer! Time for barbecue,
Which Anti-B prefers not to do.
But his choice of food’s wrong!
He’d quickly change his song
Were mauve dinosaur on the menu.
Doc Maroon’s gone football-daft, a bit.
(How those ruffians curse, roar and spit!)
I predict, Gothic ended,
The next tale he’s intended
Will have us all dressed in football kit.
Closure, by the SafeTinspector,
Was in my dream last night. By heck! The
Lead roles were played by Brad
Pitt, Sting and Cheryl Ladd -
Sam Peckinpah was the director.
About his accent Kim's never lied;
There's nary a hint of a Scotch side.
So: what vocal inflections
(In our ‘Brits Abroad’ section)
Afflict Binty, and ProblemChildBride?
These are a bit laboured, and not nearly as good as they used to be. I have a headache and I need to lie down now. I'm sorry. Two 400 mg ibuprofen plus two Hot Lava Java coffees in the morning, they'll do the trick.
Comments:
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Footie took time to make rhymes
and had a very good time
abused his own muse
the edge said he lose
but the verses were all quite fine.
and had a very good time
abused his own muse
the edge said he lose
but the verses were all quite fine.
My accent, dear Footie 's an odd'un
Not Irish, not Viking, not Heilun'
We in the Islands
(But not in the Highlands)
Sound like Olaf AND Angus AND Behan
(Mixed up)
Our esses are long, soft and Swedish
Our vowels are extended and flattish
We intone like we're singing
Into Gaelic oft slipping
As an accent, we're dying and pastish.
Not Irish, not Viking, not Heilun'
We in the Islands
(But not in the Highlands)
Sound like Olaf AND Angus AND Behan
(Mixed up)
Our esses are long, soft and Swedish
Our vowels are extended and flattish
We intone like we're singing
Into Gaelic oft slipping
As an accent, we're dying and pastish.
Of non-perilous tins he's a spector;
In your comments he'll hound and he'll hector;
And given the time
He'll do violent crime
On the limerick muse, till he's wrecked her.
In your comments he'll hound and he'll hector;
And given the time
He'll do violent crime
On the limerick muse, till he's wrecked her.
I read your limericks with interest,
They could start an entirely new blog-fest.
The problem for me,
As far as I see,
Is working out how to make the last bloody line work
They could start an entirely new blog-fest.
The problem for me,
As far as I see,
Is working out how to make the last bloody line work
I've always enjoyed such a test
but thinking of lines makes me stressed
Perhaps if I ponder
and cast my mind yonder
This verse with good rhymes shall be blessed
but thinking of lines makes me stressed
Perhaps if I ponder
and cast my mind yonder
This verse with good rhymes shall be blessed
SafeTinspector has cheese
Random dogs prob'ly have flease
this line is shorter
and so's this reporter
Limerick done now--with ease!
Random dogs prob'ly have flease
this line is shorter
and so's this reporter
Limerick done now--with ease!
structurally sound rhyme one
unbelievably good clown pun
five syllables here
good for a year
impeccably bad, now its done.
unbelievably good clown pun
five syllables here
good for a year
impeccably bad, now its done.
This limerick is quite good
'cause I talk about yummy-yum food
take the lead
I once read
very fed up with blood
'cause I talk about yummy-yum food
take the lead
I once read
very fed up with blood
This line simply don't rhyme
and neither does this one of course
So screw off you dogs
go jump in a lake
Its fathers day here in the Sta-I mean, USA.
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and neither does this one of course
So screw off you dogs
go jump in a lake
Its fathers day here in the Sta-I mean, USA.
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